How To Get The Second Date

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by: PamBaldwin
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Word Count: 536

First you have to ask yourself (before you wonder how to get the second date): do I want the second date? If the person seems normal and likeable and you feel you have an emotional connection, the answer is probably "yes." The thing is, if you seemed the same way, the answer would probably also be "yes" if you asked for that second date.

If, on the other hand, you have been set up with this person through one of the numerous dating sites online then this is actually your "second date." On these sites they match people up based on your personalities and allow you to get to know each other in an informal setting. Getting to the second date is very similar in how you get to the first date with the person you met online.

Your date should have the privilege of getting to know the real you as much as possible during that first meeting. If you're unconfident or nervous then it hides who you really are. Be yourself and let your real personality come through. Slight nervousness is expected with first dates but you if you can't even set still during the date then it's going to take away from who you are.

Be confident but not so overconfident it puts people off to you. In order to develop that level of confidence you must first succeed in those situations where you must exude that confidence. That's where the problem is. If you aren't successful in those situations then it becomes extremely tough to be confident in them. The best thing to do is fake it until you do develop that confidence. The first few times you try it you may be freaking out in your head but keep your composure and play it off. Keep anything self destructive you might say about yourself to yourself and it will work out much better. After a few successful attempts it will get easier each time.

That's normal, now here's likeable. Embrace your imperfections, accept them rather than defend them. Don't display them, but, rather, if they show up, smile and acknowledge it with a little humor to show you know it's unusual. If the other person won't accept that, you probably don't really want another date with them.

Don't worry if there isn't a strong emotional connection right away. They take time to develop, especially if you want one that lasts. However, if you have similar senses of humor, think similarly, and make eye contact easily then you have the start of a good emotional connection.

Ending the evening at the high point is crucial in getting the second date. This leaves your date wanting to spend more time with you. That right there is the true key to getting the second date.

Don't be so afraid of making a mistake that you make up lame excuses to leave when it's going good either. This can make you seem uninterested. Set a time limit for your date and stick to it. If it's going extraordinarily well then stick with it as long as you can.

About the Author

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